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Why is christianity not yet a perfect religion

Article by Oswalo U. Chikere

THE IRONY OF CHRISTIANITY By Oswalo U. Chikere

Understanding Christianity has been a perennial problem since the death of Jesus Christ. Despite the fact that many Christians, Christian scholars, and Christian theologians might not agree to this, it is the truth. The problem of Christianity is not in its definition or as a service to God (man’s function to God) but it is as a service to mankind. This is because Jesus Christ (the believed son of God) didn’t directly teach how man should behave to his fellow man (whether woman or man)… I do not dispute that Jesus taught who God is, the expectations of man to God, and, indirectly, man’s service to man. This write-up is not for the purpose of arguing whether Jesus Christ directly taught man service to man or to analyze the lapses of Jesus Christ (if there were), but to elaborating the expectations of Christianity.

Research has proved that Christianity came into existence at Antioch where the disciples/apostles of Jesus Christ were called Christians (Christ like). Since certain religions existed before Christianity, some during it, and others still existing, therefore, it’s not my call to debate on when Christianity originated, even when Acts of the Apostles of the Holy Bible (a book containing the teachings, history, and expectations of God) recorded the word Christian was first used in Antioch. Despite the uncertainty of this fact, one thing is certain and it is that Christianity is the religion of God, taught by Jesus Christ. Therefore, a Christian can be defined as anybody who believes in Christianity. And, ‘Christianity is the religion based on the teachings and works of Jesus Christ’-Oxford Dictionary Ovi.

Though millions have studied or are studying Christianity in schools (especially in the university); some claim to have been called by God, to have seen the light, etc. it does not mean that they have come to meet God, or know God more than us (they claim some of us have not seen the light), or God has explained Christianity to them…. Today, when I look at individuals or group of individuals who claims to be messengers of God (Evangelists, Pastors, Reverend Fathers, Elders, Apostles, Knights, Deacons, Imams, etc.), I weep for them because they are ignorant yet do not no they are ignorant (according to Socrates).

Brethren, be not deceived, God has not given any man an exclusive/unique understanding of Christianity/the Bible, or individual or collective metaphysical powers, or whatever they might be calling it, rather He (through Jesus Christ) urges man to go into the world, make disciples in His name, baptizing them in the name of the father, the son, and the Holy Spirit, and commanding them to observe all Jesus taught in his time on earth. In doing this, God did not give power to anybody, or classify man into messengers and followers, or urged man to complete the statement they feel Jesus didn’t complete or make statement Jesus didn’t make or removing from statement Jesus made or interpreting statements in the way Jesus Christ didn’t. (Anybody who has received Christ and is baptized can perform the function of recruiting souls for God)Whether a pastor, evangelist, reverend, deacon, deaconess, elder, chorister in church (no matter the church), cleaner in church, new member, floor member (someone not holding any post), or not a Christian, we are all one and equal in the sight of God. If you didn’t know, know today that God created all of us (human beings) as part of a tree (Himself), therefore, we are all important and complement to each other (no one can survive without the other). Paul in the Bible explained this when he said no gift of the spirit is better than the other, and the church is like the different part of the body; without the hand or leg or head or brain, etc. the body (the church) will not function well. Even this song tells moreWe are Heirs of the Father,We are Jointed to the Son,We are Children of the Kingdom,We are Family,We are OneMany individuals and group of individuals have selfishly made themselves messengers of God, and are ignorantly winning ignorant souls for the devil. It is true, and let me remind you, that Jesus warned against false witnesses, false prophets, false jesus’, etc. but I’m not sure he expected it to be this much.The religion of Christ is suppose to be a monist religion (a total believe and worship in/of God, and God alone). Today’s Christianity for many people and in many places are now impure (mixed), no longer pure (primary, whole, or undiluted), and this is not Christianity (don’t be deceived). Mixed in the sense that things have started to determine, give reasons and condition how Christianity is to be followed; some of these factors include- environment, friends, over consciousness, over zealousness, individual goals, temptations, pride, and mostly education (especially the tertiary education).

I was at a seminar one day where genotype and marriage was the topic for discussion. I, must, confess that the B.A. Medicine, and B.A. Psychologists who were invited to deal with the topic did justice to it, not until they mentioned ‘if your genotype and that of your relationship partner is screaming disaster, run for your lives’ (though not directly or at the same time).

One might ask (mostly the educated ones), what is wrong with it? Isn’t it right?… Or even exclaim yes! That’s true! Correct!…. The truth remains that it was not a religious statement to make. (Another might ask, but it wasn’t in a religious concept, was it?). The problem of not understanding Christianity originates from classifying the world into moral and religious departments which God (the creator) didn’t classify. Education has turned the world up-side-down, yes, because it has and is opening the eyes of human beings (especially those who can’t hold to their faith); in fact, permit me to say that the tree God didn’t want Adam and Eve to eat from is education.(Back to the story) So, if I were SS and my right woman were SS also, what should I do? After searching till I became 50, do I continue searching? What if I don’t find another? What if I’ve become too familiar with her that I can’t let go? What if we’ve sworn to our love? Since everybody is running from me, what do I do? The answer the scientist might give to you is find someone AA. What if I don’t find? What if the one I found is scared of risking/ruining his one/last opportunity? Another might say, and then go for some with SS. If I went for SS would there be any joy knowing that my children might die? Or that my wife might die during delivery? and so on. After thinking of all these, I might end up not getting married, committing suicide, living a reserved and private life, etc. I must tell you that so many people (might not have been an SS example- may be HIV, AIDS, one form of disability, etc. you know them, so tell yourself, and ask yourself how you would feel if it were you) have chosen between either of the three alternatives, especially suicide. Hearing it from a doctor, friend, lecturer/teacher, etc. might not kill them but from a messenger of God/spiritual adviser (Imam, Pastor, etc.) will… yet they still preach love your neighbours as yourself, help others, don’t kill, etc. when themselves are partaking in killing. Answering or attempting to answer some of the above questions will enlighten you more on how discrimination, rejection, suicide, hate, anger, the motive for suicide bombing, robbery, etc. came into existence. What is most annoying (to me) is when these scholars tell you God is responsible for showing them this light. Or that if God were God, why wouldn’t he attend to the cry of this people? or even make them like that at first?

Ask yourself questions like; if it were me or someone I love, how would I/they feel? If we finish categorizing the world, how would it look like? Do we really love ourselves? Is God completely in charge? Is this really Christianity?, etc. Before this educational light came into existence or in the early days of Christianity, people didn’t need to know their genotypes before they marry, seek metaphysical answers to questions, look at the disability of one before employing him, or look at the success rate before making one a friend and half brother, etc. The indirect message of Jesus to mankind (to me) is ‘love’ (love not measurable, conditioned, or fostered by certain criteria). And for this love to exist, or we (Christians or non-Christians) to possess the type of love Jesus preached, we need to allow humility (the act of having or showing a modest or low estimate of one’s own importance) possess us, but this can happen only when we totally empty ourselves and allow the Holy Spirit to enter in to us. When this happens, Christianity would truly be defined, and effective because we would love ourselves, we would have completely eliminated any room for negativity, like-the criticizing of the Christian religion, discrimination, rejection, class distinction, pride, we would have become one perfect religion, united ourselves, and pursuing after one goal with one religion, one preacher, one road, and possibly one messenger of God at a time.

Anyone who cannot follow you to your church,Who criticizes(d) the doctrines or believes of your church, Who cannot help/assist you in times of needWho does not understand, trust, believe, etc. in you or your ability, Who attends a different church from you,Who is proud,Whose interpretation of the Bible is different from yours,Whose prayer pattern,Whose mission you don’t understand,Who cannot forsake his position or possession for,Who does not see you as a friend and brother, Who does not take advice, Who backbites, quarrels, fights, boasts, etc. is not a child of God, not a Christian… period! His either not a believer of any faith or a believer of another religion; maybe money religion, business religion, education religion, science religion, medicine religion, etc lol

The earlier we stop, generally, distinguishing between Christians and non-Christians, the better for us, our Christian race, and the more we will be winning souls for God, love our brothers, and making the world to become one (a better place, and a heaven on earth). We can only be different in the ways we pray, we talk, we do our things… but we are the same in the sight of the gods we believe in; in fact, we are doing the same work of God but with His different attribute (as in, idol worshippers worshipping the omnipresence of God, seers worshipping the future-telling nature of God, etc. by this, I can infer that the different religions worships one God, but with His different attributes/characteristics).Be not deceived my friend, religion (no matter the type; Islamic, Christian, Buddhist, etc) is like a military parade ground; where every soldier is in the same uniform, dressed in the same pattern, with the same arms, responding to one commandant, replying in the same tone and format, and parading/matching uniformly. Whether a Buddhist, Muslim, Jew, Christian, Traditional worshipper or whatever religion, believe wholly on your god, the teachings of your god, and let no reason or development be responsible for making you condition, deviate, or determine how you serve your god.

About the Author

Founder of the The Exclusive Service Organization; an organization that is only engaged with COUNSELLING, SECURITY, AND COMPUTER WORKS. He is moltivational and educational writer who has published books, and still have many un-published write ups in store.Also, he is a singular achiever who had held and is still holding leadership positions in some reputable companies and organization (both in religious and ordinary), soundly counselled and adviced individauls and companies to positivity, accepted and positive touched lives, etc. He is a growing philosopher, still a youth, and from a catholic responsible family.

For enquiry, sponsorship, counselling or interest purposes, he can be contacted on 2348064008844 or theexclusiveserviceorganization@hotmail.com

The Irony of Christianity

Article by Oswalo U. Chikere

THE IRONY OF CHRISTIANITY By Oswalo U. Chikere

Understanding Christianity has been a perennial problem since the death of Jesus Christ. Despite the fact that many Christians, Christian scholars, and Christian theologians might not agree to this, it is the truth. The problem of Christianity is not in its definition or as a service to God (man’s function to God) but it is as a service to mankind. This is because Jesus Christ (the believed son of God) didn’t directly teach how man should behave to his fellow man (whether woman or man)… I do not dispute that Jesus taught who God is, the expectations of man to God, and, indirectly, man’s service to man. This write-up is not for the purpose of arguing whether Jesus Christ directly taught man service to man or to analyze the lapses of Jesus Christ (if there were), but to elaborating the expectations of Christianity.

Research has proved that Christianity came into existence at Antioch where the disciples/apostles of Jesus Christ were called Christians (Christ like). Since certain religions existed before Christianity, some during it, and others still existing, therefore, it’s not my call to debate on when Christianity originated, even when Acts of the Apostles of the Holy Bible (a book containing the teachings, history, and expectations of God) recorded the word Christian was first used in Antioch. Despite the uncertainty of this fact, one thing is certain and it is that Christianity is the religion of God, taught by Jesus Christ. Therefore, a Christian can be defined as anybody who believes in Christianity. And, ‘Christianity is the religion based on the teachings and works of Jesus Christ’-Oxford Dictionary Ovi.

Though millions have studied or are studying Christianity in schools (especially in the university); some claim to have been called by God, to have seen the light, etc. it does not mean that they have come to meet God, or know God more than us (they claim some of us have not seen the light), or God has explained Christianity to them…. Today, when I look at individuals or group of individuals who claims to be messengers of God (Evangelists, Pastors, Reverend Fathers, Elders, Apostles, Knights, Deacons, Imams, etc.), I weep for them because they are ignorant yet do not no they are ignorant (according to Socrates).

Brethren, be not deceived, God has not given any man an exclusive/unique understanding of Christianity/the Bible, or individual or collective metaphysical powers, or whatever they might be calling it, rather He (through Jesus Christ) urges man to go into the world, make disciples in His name, baptizing them in the name of the father, the son, and the Holy Spirit, and commanding them to observe all Jesus taught in his time on earth. In doing this, God did not give power to anybody, or classify man into messengers and followers, or urged man to complete the statement they feel Jesus didn’t complete or make statement Jesus didn’t make or removing from statement Jesus made or interpreting statements in the way Jesus Christ didn’t. (Anybody who has received Christ and is baptized can perform the function of recruiting souls for God)Whether a pastor, evangelist, reverend, deacon, deaconess, elder, chorister in church (no matter the church), cleaner in church, new member, floor member (someone not holding any post), or not a Christian, we are all one and equal in the sight of God. If you didn’t know, know today that God created all of us (human beings) as part of a tree (Himself), therefore, we are all important and complement to each other (no one can survive without the other). Paul in the Bible explained this when he said no gift of the spirit is better than the other, and the church is like the different part of the body; without the hand or leg or head or brain, etc. the body (the church) will not function well. Even this song tells moreWe are Heirs of the Father,We are Jointed to the Son,We are Children of the Kingdom,We are Family,We are OneMany individuals and group of individuals have selfishly made themselves messengers of God, and are ignorantly winning ignorant souls for the devil. It is true, and let me remind you, that Jesus warned against false witnesses, false prophets, false jesus’, etc. but I’m not sure he expected it to be this much.The religion of Christ is suppose to be a monist religion (a total believe and worship in/of God, and God alone). Today’s Christianity for many people and in many places are now impure (mixed), no longer pure (primary, whole, or undiluted), and this is not Christianity (don’t be deceived). Mixed in the sense that things have started to determine, give reasons and condition how Christianity is to be followed; some of these factors include- environment, friends, over consciousness, over zealousness, individual goals, temptations, pride, and mostly education (especially the tertiary education).

I was at a seminar one day where genotype and marriage was the topic for discussion. I, must, confess that the B.A. Medicine, and B.A. Psychologists who were invited to deal with the topic did justice to it, not until they mentioned ‘if your genotype and that of your relationship partner is screaming disaster, run for your lives’ (though not directly or at the same time).

One might ask (mostly the educated ones), what is wrong with it? Isn’t it right?… Or even exclaim yes! That’s true! Correct!…. The truth remains that it was not a religious statement to make. (Another might ask, but it wasn’t in a religious concept, was it?). The problem of not understanding Christianity originates from classifying the world into moral and religious departments which God (the creator) didn’t classify. Education has turned the world up-side-down, yes, because it has and is opening the eyes of human beings (especially those who can’t hold to their faith); in fact, permit me to say that the tree God didn’t want Adam and Eve to eat from is education.(Back to the story) So, if I were SS and my right woman were SS also, what should I do? After searching till I became 50, do I continue searching? What if I don’t find another? What if I’ve become too familiar with her that I can’t let go? What if we’ve sworn to our love? Since everybody is running from me, what do I do? The answer the scientist might give to you is find someone AA. What if I don’t find? What if the one I found is scared of risking/ruining his one/last opportunity? Another might say, and then go for some with SS. If I went for SS would there be any joy knowing that my children might die? Or that my wife might die during delivery? and so on. After thinking of all these, I might end up not getting married, committing suicide, living a reserved and private life, etc. I must tell you that so many people (might not have been an SS example- may be HIV, AIDS, one form of disability, etc. you know them, so tell yourself, and ask yourself how you would feel if it were you) have chosen between either of the three alternatives, especially suicide. Hearing it from a doctor, friend, lecturer/teacher, etc. might not kill them but from a messenger of God/spiritual adviser (Imam, Pastor, etc.) will… yet they still preach love your neighbours as yourself, help others, don’t kill, etc. when themselves are partaking in killing. Answering or attempting to answer some of the above questions will enlighten you more on how discrimination, rejection, suicide, hate, anger, the motive for suicide bombing, robbery, etc. came into existence. What is most annoying (to me) is when these scholars tell you God is responsible for showing them this light. Or that if God were God, why wouldn’t he attend to the cry of this people? or even make them like that at first?

Ask yourself questions like; if it were me or someone I love, how would I/they feel? If we finish categorizing the world, how would it look like? Do we really love ourselves? Is God completely in charge? Is this really Christianity?, etc. Before this educational light came into existence or in the early days of Christianity, people didn’t need to know their genotypes before they marry, seek metaphysical answers to questions, look at the disability of one before employing him, or look at the success rate before making one a friend and half brother, etc. The indirect message of Jesus to mankind (to me) is ‘love’ (love not measurable, conditioned, or fostered by certain criteria). And for this love to exist, or we (Christians or non-Christians) to possess the type of love Jesus preached, we need to allow humility (the act of having or showing a modest or low estimate of one’s own importance) possess us, but this can happen only when we totally empty ourselves and allow the Holy Spirit to enter in to us. When this happens, Christianity would truly be defined, and effective because we would love ourselves, we would have completely eliminated any room for negativity, like-the criticizing of the Christian religion, discrimination, rejection, class distinction, pride, we would have become one perfect religion, united ourselves, and pursuing after one goal with one religion, one preacher, one road, and possibly one messenger of God at a time.

Anyone who cannot follow you to your church,Who criticizes(d) the doctrines or believes of your church, Who cannot help/assist you in times of needWho does not understand, trust, believe, etc. in you or your ability, Who attends a different church from you,Who is proud,Whose interpretation of the Bible is different from yours,Whose prayer pattern,Whose mission you don’t understand,Who cannot forsake his position or possession for,Who does not see you as a friend and brother, Who does not take advice, Who backbites, quarrels, fights, boasts, etc. is not a child of God, not a Christian… period! His either not a believer of any faith or a believer of another religion; maybe money religion, business religion, education religion, science religion, medicine religion, etc lol

The earlier we stop, generally, distinguishing between Christians and non-Christians, the better for us, our Christian race, and the more we will be winning souls for God, love our brothers, and making the world to become one (a better place, and a heaven on earth). We can only be different in the ways we pray, we talk, we do our things… but we are the same in the sight of the gods we believe in; in fact, we are doing the same work of God but with His different attribute (as in, idol worshippers worshipping the omnipresence of God, seers worshipping the future-telling nature of God, etc. by this, I can infer that the different religions worships one God, but with His different attributes/characteristics).Be not deceived my friend, religion (no matter the type; Islamic, Christian, Buddhist, etc) is like a military parade ground; where every soldier is in the same uniform, dressed in the same pattern, with the same arms, responding to one commandant, replying in the same tone and format, and parading/matching uniformly. Whether a Buddhist, Muslim, Jew, Christian, Traditional worshipper or whatever religion, believe wholly on your god, the teachings of your god, and let no reason or development be responsible for making you condition, deviate, or determine how you serve your god.

About the Author

Founder of the The Exclusive Service Organization; an organization that is only engaged with COUNSELLING, SECURITY, AND COMPUTER WORKS. He is moltivational and educational writer who has published books, and still have many un-published write ups in store.Also, he is a singular achiever who had held and is still holding leadership positions in some reputable companies and organization (both in religious and ordinary), soundly counselled and adviced individauls and companies to positivity, accepted and positive touched lives, etc. He is a growing philosopher, still a youth, and from a catholic responsible family.

For enquiry, sponsorship, counselling or interest purposes, he can be contacted on 2348064008844 or theexclusiveserviceorganization@hotmail.com

Summer gothic love

The summer is already here and it is your time to find your new gothic love. But first, why the summer time is the perfect chance for new love life? First and foremost in this season most of the people are going out of the house so you can meet lots of new gothic people that where closed behinds heavy and cold doors in the winter. Second it is the nature of life to fall in love in the summer it also happened in the animal kingdom and whether we like it or not we are a part of nature.

Being a gothic person in the summer is not an easy job. How can you continue being cold and dark when all your surrounding and especially the weather is so hot, bright and shinny? The good news is that you are not a lone in these situations. There are lots of gothic people like you that are looking of new love especially in the summer time. You can find most of them at online dating sites. Now most of the dates – whether they are gothic or not are in the nights – when it is less hot and you can continue wearing long gothic clothes. But the best of it you can keep merging with the darkness and the unknown. Meaning – continue to be a true gothic person.

Gothic love When you plan your gothic summer include a new adventure in it. There is a reason why we have four seasons in a year – we need a small change every few months otherwise we just feel hopeless, bored and stuck in the same place. So when you get the chance start meeting new gothic people you can never known to where it will take you. And who knows? Why be you will end up find you true gothic love in this summer.

Save Your Marriage On Your Own

Article by Bobby David

One of the most common questions we encounter at savemymarriagetoday.com is this: how could one partner save their floundering marriage on their own? It is a typical enough story – one partner leaves, the other stays. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that has caused a couple to be apart, the one person who remains bears the prospect, fear, doubt, desire, hope of saving his or her marriage… ALONE.

In some of our minds, it stands to argue that since there are two people in this marriage, shouldn’t both of us be present to actually try and save it? Or, worse, it’s his, her, their fault so shouldn’t he, she, they be the ones to make amends? I am just the victim here, after all!

We are telling you right now – if you want to save your marriage and if you find yourself alone in this desire, the above will definitely not help you do it — that type of talk is at the minimum, negative and at most, self-defeating! It propagates the belief that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you should just let it go down the drain. So not true. There is still something you CAN DO. Even in your loneliness and solitude, you CAN save your marriage.

How? Let’s begin first by examining what it means to be on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. After all, it’s part of our make up to be social creatures. In fact, babies develop very early on feelings of trust, companionship and parental support. If they don’t get these, say when they’re hungry we fail to feed them on time, or if they’re wet, we fail to change their diaper, humans develop fears of mistrust, abandonment and solitude. Unfortunately, we carry these fears with us as we get older.

The paradox is that as we grow older in the love, trust, companionship and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us whole, happy human beings. Ideally, the mature human person should have developed a strong sense of self-awareness, confidence and self-esteem as he or she reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we view the world, flaws and all. These make up part of our personal shelter amidst challenges and difficulties. This is called SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, many of us enter into adult life without even being aware of this beautiful, human truth. We may have experienced abandonment in our childhood or been disappointed by our romantic relationships; whatever it is, it has caused to shift from proper mature development to fears of abandonment and the inability to see that we can stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many of us enter relationships and marriages with the hope, plan and dream that we would never be alone. We invest so much on our partner, focusing our entire beings on them and relying on them to make us happy and secure. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own poison. It’s as if we have blinders on all the time. When our partner indicates some form of dissatisfaction with the relationship, we panic. When our partner leaves, our fears kick in. When something goes wrong with our marriages, it is very easy for us to place the blame of the other person for having made us unhappy.

In order to save your marriage on your own, the key then is a paradigm shift, meaning, the key is to change your attitude and focus. Stop focusing on your partner – stop the blaming, stop the inaction. Take a good look at yourself. You can definitely NOT control your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions but you can control your own. You can go from fearing abandonment to actually taking responsibility for yourself and your own happiness. This is where the human truth about self-actualization comes in. Understand, adapt and internalize this for yourself. Learn it. It will spell the difference not just in your marriage but in YOU.

A whole human being is easy to love. A happy person attracts happiness. In starting with yourself, you can move from being an unhappy, clingy, difficult person to one who can provide an environment of safety, wisdom, trust and open communication. From hereon, dealing with your straying partner could even get easier – for you and for them. For all you know, you may just surprise each other.

Rather than beat yourself up in desperation, try these:

- Breathe- Smile- Let go- Believe that reconnection is possible- See a counselor for YOURSELF not just for your marriage- Examine your part in contributing to the difficulties in your marriage- Forgive yourself- Change- Look after your health, beauty and well-being

For all you know, your partner (and you) may just rediscover the person they first fell in love with and more. For all you know, this is the type of you that would allow your partner to come back and initiate communication. When that happens, you have every opportunity to sit down with him or her, discuss your motivations, plans and feelings. You can even get to the real issues surrounding your marital difficulties and actually begin taking positive steps to work them through.

In being open and mature, you can also provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once more. With all the confidence and sincerity you have gathered, take these steps. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or difficulties, find it in you to continue loving your partner and showing him or her that you do. Through little, subtle acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t have to be grand gestures, they just have to be sincere. And coming from the mature, new you, they will.

About the Author

For more information go to http://fraserrd.savemarria.hop.clickbank.net/?type=minicourse

Common Marriage Problems

Article by Senangin

For many couples, there are common marriage problems which often start to creep into the relationship over time. If you are feeling that your marriage isn’t what it should be, or what you thought it would be when you first walked down the aisle, you are not alone. Millions of couples grapple with relationship issues, often feeling that the problems are unique to their relationship. This can lead to feelings of embarrassment and / or loneliness, when it doesn’t need to.

So let’s take a look at three common marriage problems which many couples find themselves facing. All of these can start out seeming fairly minor, but if they continue over a long time and aren’t dealt with, they can have a very negative impact on a marriage.

Feeling like you have “fallen out of love” with each other

When you were first dating your spouse, and probably even when you stood in front of your family and friends and said your vows, you felt “head over heels in love” with each other. For most couples, that giddy feeling doesn’t last over the years. In fact, for many, once the reality of day to day married life sinks in it starts to fade. Your lives become one of routine, which is perfectly normal. The demands of your work or careers, children and mortgages can take up all of your time and energy. And if you are like some couples, you basically start living like roommates and nothing more. While that scenario is fairly common, marriage problems like this can eventually lead to an affair or a divorce.

Taking each other for granted

Another one of the most common marriage problems is that many couples start taking each other for granted. To some degree, it is human nature to take for granted that which is always there. But in relationships, this can lead to a slow, simmering resentment for one or both of you. Everyone longs to feel loved, cherished, and appreciated. After all, that was a big part of the reason you got married in the first place. No one feels loved when they are taken for granted. When it reaches the point of devaluing each other and failing to regard the relationship as sacred or special, it can be very damaging. Sadly, what often happens is that you don’t even realize just how serious it is until the other person is gone.

Failure to really talk to each other

Poor communication or the failure to really talk to each other is probably one of the most common marriage problems many couples face. Learning to communicate well is a skill many people lack. Others have the skill and may be great communicators in their career, but struggle with communicating with their spouse. This is particularly true if one or both of you grew up in a home where poor communication was the norm. You talk superficially but avoid discussing problems or issues as they arise. Some people just find it easier to avoid any conflict. Unfortunately, this doesn’t work and in time will take a toll on your relationship if something doesn’t change.

If you and your spouse are struggling with any one of these common marriage problems, there is hope. The first step is always acknowledging the problem. The sooner you recognize the problem and take action though, the better!For more info,just follow the link:

About the Author

http://savemarriage-secret.blogspot.com/

Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online

Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free and see the stunning performance of Julia Roberts in her role as the famous Elizabeth Gilbert. Based on the true story of Elizabeth Gilbert through the original book of her memoirs, Eat, Pray Love is the journey of one woman as she travels around the world in an attempt to find the meaning of life and discover her own true identity.

Happily married and trying for a baby Elizabeth Gilbert is far from unhappy. On top of that she also has her own home and a successful career. However, one day she realises her whole life has been nothing but a string of boyfriends and she has never had two minutes to be herself. Elizabeth sets off around the world after going through a painful divorce to regain her lost identity.

Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free to see one of the most heart felt and gripping drama movies of the year as she travels from Italy to India and finally to Bali. In Italy she discovers the true pleasure of eating, in India she learns the meaning of prayer and finally in Bali she discovers love and it’s true harmony.

Check out the trailer online right now if you have yet to Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free. When you Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free trailer you will quickly see why so many people are already trying to Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free right now. Due for release on the 12th August 2010 many people will have to wait for a few months yet before they can Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free. However, you can always Watch Eat, Pray, Love Online Free trailers while you wait.

Sex, drugs, and love

Article by askaande@gmail.com

Have you ever asked yourself why are so many, maybe most of us, unhappy, lonely, alone, unfulfilled, alienated, frustrated? By they way have you ever noticed that there are so many words for unhappiness while there are so few for happiness: happy, glad, satisfied and a few more, while there is virtually an unlimited number of terms for the opposite state of mind. It seems that nowadays we are unhappier than ever. Why are people unhappy even when they have a car, a CD and a DVD, an HD recorder, LCD TV and PSP… anything that should make you happy. They have all and still they aren’t happy. How strange. Once a pony time the blacks used to run naked in the jungles of Africa sporting only a modest covering of the genitals without access to TV and … guess what… they were happy. Not all that ago the whites used to run in and out of the forests covered in furs – without a single car in sight – and guess what….?Today we are all unhappy, although we can buy Scotch whisky in a bottle shop, a Chinese made watch in any shop, a Japanese made car… in fact anything you can dream of… and yet we are not happy. Strange thing: the richer we are, the more dissatisfied we seem to become. And we are on a constant quest for happiness

Integrity – Love Happens – Love Movies! – Movie Match Author – David Gruder, Ph.D

Dr. Burke Ryan is “A-Okay” in life, at least that is what he tells his audience. A self-help guru, Burke’s career is rapidly taking off as he teaches others how to be “A-Okay” despite pain and loss. Only one problem, Burke has never fully digested the experience of his own loss. And, until Love Happens, he is woefully out of integrity, something he desperately needs to resolve, if love is ever going to happen in his life at all.

Why is Burke out of integrity? How do any of us end up out of integrity in life? Usually, the process happens gradually. Often the decision to go out of integrity is made through a misguided attempt to survive when basic childhood needs are not met in life. That’s what David Gruder, Ph.D. asserts in his book The New IQ: How Integrity Intelligence Serves You, Your Relationships, and Our World. As children, he states, we all have certain needs that include: a need to cuddle, to feel validated, to learn how to handle painful experiences well, and to understand the value of the word “no,” so we know how to set boundaries and learn to respect our limitations. But, when we don’t receive these, we move through life feeling increasingly dis-integrated, or out of connection, with ourselves, others, and the world around us.

Though we have no understanding of Burke’s childhood in the film Love Happens, obviously, like most people, something has happened that has led him to adopt a pattern of deception over the course of his life. Gruder relates childhood incidents that typically lead us away from choosing integrity (or wholeness) as follows:

Gruder’s List of Childhood Traumas.

Being intruded upon or violated by others.

Being abandoned and left to sort out life or make it through life on our own.

Being indulged in such a way we didn’t have to take responsibility for ourselves because someone else, or something else, took the blame for us.

Others stealing the attention from us so our pain or talents are not validated.

All these disintegrating experiences lead to feeling disconnected. To survive these horrible feelings we tend to adopt the following survival methods.

Gruder’s List of Ways We Attempt to Survive Trauma and Disconnection

Manufacture a Happy Ending Fantasy to give us hope and help us feel safe, connected, and accepted by others despite what has happened in our lives.

Create Rules to follow to help your happy ending fantasy come true.

Build a Pandora’s Box where you put everything (good and bad) that you feel other’s won’t accept, along with all your undigested pain in life.

Create a Mask of an acceptable self-image that others can relate to, and hope they won’t suspect you have a Pandora’s Box, or want to know what is inside of it.

Use Anesthesias (like drugs, alcohol, comfort food, etc.) to numb out your pain.

Certainly in the film Love Happens we see Burke using most of these ways to cope. To begin with he is often seen numbing out his pain with alcohol. Then he creates a happy ending fantasy about his wife’s death that isn’t true. To cope with her loss he creates rules that he gives himself and others of how to cope and be “A-Okay” in life. Though he is encouraging others to open up their Pandora’s Box and confront their pain and shame, he has yet to fully open up his own. All of this leads him to develop a public mask that begins to crack throughout the film. It cracks in part because he can’t live with his own inner shame, but also because he feels safe at last to reveal his true self due to the love extended to him by others.

Burke discovers then what Gruder reveals, that adopting the above survival methods don’t help us at all. They only lead to a greater lack of integrity in our lives. How to really integrate, become whole, and recover? Take the transformational route instead (what Gruder calls the adult path of development). Then Love Happens because we have allowed life’s wake-up calls (accidents, sudden successes, illnesses, heart-breaks, life changes, transcendent experiences) to help us cultivate the following:

Gruder’s Seven WisePassions, or “all-purpose life skills.”

Teachability (a willingness to learn what you need to from life).

Self Care (learning ways to truly care for yourself).

Discernment (knowing what does and does not lead to integrity and wholeness).

Harvesting (the past and integrating it into the present in a healthy way).

Power (cultivated in such a way you can use your gifts fully in service to others).

Synergy (knowing how to work cooperatively with others for the greater good).

Stewardship (discovering how you can use whatever you acquire to help bring
greater integrity and wholeness to yourself and those around you).

Fortunately, Burke finally becomes teachable (in the same way he helps to teach others). And, as he floods himself with compassion, and accepts compassion from others, he discovers how to better take care of himself. Through discernment over what was, and was not, his fault in his wife’s death, he is able to let go of maladaptive behaviors that cause him to avoid his pain, or lead him to punish himself unfairly. By at last taking time to harvest the lessons from his past, he is released into greater power to do good, allowing him to help people feel truly “A-Okay” in life. And, finally healed, he no longer pushes away people who both love him, and can synergize with him to help him accomplish what he is meant to in the world. The end result? As Love Happens and Burke comes into integrity, it appears as if he will be someone capable of making a real difference in the lives of others. In short, he is more likely to be a good steward of the potential gifts that may be coming his way from this point forward.

As for us and the areas we are out of integrity? We can also follow the steps Burke goes through and Gruder recommends. We don’t have to build up layer after layer of lies, hiding the truth from ourselves and others in an attempt to survive. With compassion and love something else can happen. We can be freed into integrity and wholeness. We can be freed to love and be loved.

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NOTE: This article is Copyrighted as of 2009 by LoveMovies! All Rights Reserved

What are Engagement Rings

Article by Abner Majestic

Engagement rings are rings given to brides by bridegrooms to serve as token of their pledge to enter into marriage relationships. Engagement rings are some of the tokens of the marriage rites in many parts of the world. Similar in token to the engagement rings are wedding and anniversary rings. Rings could be made of silver, gold or platinum and they are nearly always rounded. The rounded nature of wedding rings is intended to convey the meaning of the eternity of the marriage institution the couples are about to enter into.Rings come plain or encrusted with stones, the star of the lot being diamond engagement, wedding or anniversary rings. How to select the best diamond rings require skill, your level of aesthetic values and lots of commonsense. Essentially, there are some basic elements to look out for when identifying good diamond engagement rings. The basic elements are: carat i.e. the weight of the stone, clarity, light rotation the color and very important, how the stone was cut. The ingenuity of the stone cutter determines how beautiful it will look in the ring.Talking about the cut, note that rough diamonds have faces, if an inexperienced cutter mistakes the right face, the aesthetic value will not show well. Diamonds do not always come crystal clear, some are light blue and some others have shades of pink. Good diamonds rotate the sunlight that they have entrapped. Constantly, diamonds rotate the light within them and that is the cause of the mysterious glow they emit from time to time, often every other minute. The glow that diamond wedding rings emit gives them the charm and mystery they possess.Having known the characteristics of good diamond wedding or anniversary rings, when shopping for them look for the ones that speak, that is sparkle from time to time. The person who wears good diamond jewelry to public functions will not fail to be noticed and admired. Aside from their intrinsic values the diamond rings, the personality of the wearer of good jewelry matters a lot. When you put up a very expensive engagement set to a party without the right attitude of mind the value of the jewelry will not show much. On the other hand, when you carry an attitude of “I am lovely and deserve love” to the same function, you will most likely become the focus of admiration of all present.In some countries, it is worn on the left hand, while in other countries; it is customary for the ring to be worn on the right hand. Similar traditions purportedly date to classical times, dating back from an early usage reportedly referring to the fourth finger of the left hand as containing the “vein of love”. You will find in some western societies that it is becoming more common, but still rare, that a woman will also buy her partner an engagement ring at the time of the engagement. There is a combination of the engagement ring and wedding band sold together; they are often on offer in most jewelry shops as engagement set. How you choose to wear your rings is up to you. Traditionally you only wear the engagement rings before you get married. After you are married, you may decide to wear both the engagement ring and the wedding together. The choice is yours.

About the Author

Our goal is to provide our customers with the essential information they need to make a smart online purchase. For more details on Engagement Rings and Diamond Rings please visit our website engagementringscenter.com

How to Get a Girl to Love You – In 5 Easy Steps…Too Easy!

If you’re trying to find out how to get a girl to love you then you must have read a lot of rubbish online.

There are secret scents and hypnosis techniques that all claim to be the magic formula but when it comes down to it, falling in love is a process that cannot be faked but can be MIRRORED.

When I say mirrored I mean than if you learn the common things that make a girl fall in love you can follow that process and have a much better chance of achieving your goal.

With that in mind I want to pull back the curtain and let your in on the process so you can start to use it right away.

1. Girls want to fall in love – dude, you need to open your eyes. There are millions of girls out there who want to fall in love and want to be loved back. The problem that most guys have is that they focus on just one women and never think about any other girls.

Don’t get hung up on just one chick, meet lots of women and you will have a much better chance of finding one who loves you.

2. Don’t be impatient – follow the simple pick up process and meet women every day. If you do this for just a month you will get with more girls than ever and if you’re not expecting to get married to every girl you meed you will be surprised when something cool happens.

* Try to stop being so needy and intense.
* Don’t expect anything from the girl.

4. Be a nice guy – this is an obvious one but the more you are nice to a girl the more she will get to love you.

* Hand make her a card on her birthday.
* Get tickets to her favorite show.
* Make sure you do something nice for her everyday.

5. Space space space – if she wants to go out with her friends be cool about it. Love grows not when people are chained together but when they come together like magnets.

Don’t play hard to get or ignore her, but just let her do her own thing and she will love you for it.

Final thoughts.

If you follow all the step in this article you will have a much better chance of working out how to get a girl to love you. Once you meet the perfect woman make sure you continue to show her you appreciate her every day and her love will grow over time.